Cable News

The good news is that my generation, appears to be turning off cable news, assuming we turned it on in the first place. The Daily Show and the Cobert Report notwithstanding--do they even count as news?--watchers of CNN and FOXNews are more likely to be sixty than sixteen, which shouldn't be all that surprising, but it none the less a reason to be pleased.

Seldom mentioned, however, is the fact that cable news is equally geriatric. Indeed, Fox News Channel and CNN are two of only three leading basic networks (the other being the Hallmark Channel) whose median viewer age is over 60. Headline News rings in next at 59.9, and MSNBC is still on the rickety side at 57.

This seems strangely akin to the church I attend while in the Twin Cities. And just as this doesn't bode well for Blessed Sacrament church, which recently closed the school after many years, one can't help but entertain the possibility that cable news will also cease to be in business. I shan't be long in mourning.

If you your news from television, you're doing yourself a tremendous diservice. Those who watch television boast brainwave activity analogous to being comatose, to say nothing of the fact that the news is less than newsworthy. Why do I care about Natalee Holloway? Why can't I rid myself of her name?

It is less clear whether 18-24 year olds are getting their news from alternative sources or whether MTV is all that is wanted to make of one a shallow consumerist whore. In any case, I see little good coming from endlessly observing the mutterings of lobotomy box, as Fred Reed dubs it, and being apathetic is probably better than feigning to be a responsible citizen. Those who watch FOXNews and CNN are unfortunately given suffrage, but those who watch MTV are less likely to use it. I would chalk this up as good news. The demise of O'Reilly cometh before too long.